Hi friends,
I may have written about this before, may not. I think friends are the most important thing anyone can have. I *try* to commit to my friends because I think its so important that they know their value and that they are loved.
I tend to be choosy about who I invest time in, because my dear friends: I am in it for the long haul.
Once I choose to be committed to being your friend, I don't think I leave a lot of choice in it for you. (lucky you). This is also how I get myself hurt/stressed/overwhelmed, because I only want to be/know how to be best friends or acquaintances. I'm not huge on having just regular friends. Mostly because I don't know how. And I am really struggling with that right now.
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Loved and what I've been keeping
Hi friends. I want to start by saying that, as an individual, this year has been good. In general, good things happened. I've grown in positive ways, met amazing people, and been given the chance to fall in love with God over and over again...
But for the people around me. 2012 has sucked. and not just a little bit... but majorly. I wrote a while back about my friend losing her father. I'm not sure if I shared with you all that one of my sorority sister's lost her mother. Lastly, I've known for about a month-ish but haven't been able to talk about it. Or not very much at least.
My dear friend, sorority advisor, and role model (emily) lost her baby. I can't even begin to describe how I felt when I found out... You see I was at her house when she secretly took the pregnancy test, I was sitting beside her when she texted her husband to tell her, and I was the first person to know besides her husband. The funny thing is earlier that night I had asked her about it, I had told her I wanted her to have a baby really bad, and she told me that she wanted one too. And then she made me keep it a secret. Anyone who knows me knows that I am the worst at keeping secrets. I'd ask her each week, how things were. She'd smile and whisper that things were going great. When she finally made the announcement - 4ish months after I found out.... I was thrilled and relieved.
Flash forward to May, the baby is due to be born that month. And then I get an email from our other advisor, telling us that Emily has had a miscarriage. I have been unable to deal with it. I mean its not fair. I was born (way more) premature, and I lived. Jackson died before he got to even see the world. Before the 35 girls in our chapter got to love on him, before we got to buy him cute toys and outfits. It's not fair.
The worst part about all of these sucky things that keep happening are that they are happening to genuinely good people.
But for the people around me. 2012 has sucked. and not just a little bit... but majorly. I wrote a while back about my friend losing her father. I'm not sure if I shared with you all that one of my sorority sister's lost her mother. Lastly, I've known for about a month-ish but haven't been able to talk about it. Or not very much at least.
My dear friend, sorority advisor, and role model (emily) lost her baby. I can't even begin to describe how I felt when I found out... You see I was at her house when she secretly took the pregnancy test, I was sitting beside her when she texted her husband to tell her, and I was the first person to know besides her husband. The funny thing is earlier that night I had asked her about it, I had told her I wanted her to have a baby really bad, and she told me that she wanted one too. And then she made me keep it a secret. Anyone who knows me knows that I am the worst at keeping secrets. I'd ask her each week, how things were. She'd smile and whisper that things were going great. When she finally made the announcement - 4ish months after I found out.... I was thrilled and relieved.
Flash forward to May, the baby is due to be born that month. And then I get an email from our other advisor, telling us that Emily has had a miscarriage. I have been unable to deal with it. I mean its not fair. I was born (way more) premature, and I lived. Jackson died before he got to even see the world. Before the 35 girls in our chapter got to love on him, before we got to buy him cute toys and outfits. It's not fair.
The worst part about all of these sucky things that keep happening are that they are happening to genuinely good people.
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